it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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