You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
