what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
this boner is exhausting
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
