wanna go halves on a baby?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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