My cat gives me a boner
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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