I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
It's blow job season.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
