i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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