You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
