And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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