We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
