My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
