hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize