am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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