doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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