apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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