So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I believe in your delicious
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
