they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Randomize
