After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Randomize
