I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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