I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
