Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Small penises have feelings too.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
