the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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