So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
another moral hangover. fuck.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Randomize
