I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
