If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Your cock deserves a montage
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize