What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
