Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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