alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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