Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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