There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
