It's like a parade of train wrecks.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
