i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
