I must be too annoying 4 u.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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