I got chris browned last night
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
