There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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