who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
