I'm drive I can fine osifer
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize