Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He has the fingertips of a God
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