I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize