Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Couch. On fire.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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