You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Randomize
