the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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