My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
