JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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