he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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