i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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