dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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