winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
And then he peed in my hair
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