You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
