I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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