he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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